Definitely, Maybe

I caught the movie Definitely, Maybe on HBO last Sunday. This movie is on my list of must-sees, along with Serendipity and Sweet Home Alabama -- movies that I didn't get to see but I should see, because I'm Chubbs. :p

When the credits rolled, I realized that there was a pre-defined ending all the while. Before the writers even got to work on the details of the three girlfriends, they knew that Will was going to end up with April. Their job was just to fill in the gap between the beginning and the great ending. They built the plot, they left us hanging, and kept us guessing. They filled in the little details. I know that no matter how they wrote the story, no matter how many girlfriends or misadventures the characters had, the ending will be exactly the same: Will ends up with April.

God must be one heck of a writer. Only He knows the ending to my love story. I trust that it'll be more magical than some Hollywood chick flick that I love love loved.

Being There

Have you ever felt the want to really help, but also unsure on how to go about it? For people you love waging internal battles, what can you do?

At a loss for words and action plans, I realize that when I'm in this situation, I most often say, "I'm here."

If you need me, I'm here. I'm here to help. I'm here if you just need someone to listen. I'm here for you.

Myself -- this is the least I can offer. I hope that this will be enough.

Caren, Cancer and Me

http://strengthinnumbers-us-vs-cancer.blogspot.com/
Please take time to read and help out Chris with Ate Caren's battle against cancer.

On the finality, of swaying and of wavering

It's one thing to realize that this is it. This is finally it. It's time to move on. It's time to let go. I feel the air of finality everywhere. Picture sequences play in my mind. I say good-bye. And then start with my new life. I start from the bottom and I feel humbled and free. It's great to rebuild my life with my own two hands. It's great that I consciously make decisions and not go about like a robot the whole day. I feel that my life is mine. That I hold it and do whatever I want with it.

This is it. This is finally it.

But then...

It's another thing to realize -- no, not yet. Definitely not yet. I choose to stay. I choose to hold on. I sway and waver on my initial decision. Current reality unfolds before my eyes. I stay. And continue to live in my comfort zone. I reach for the top and feel exhilarated and fulfilled. It's great to build on what I've worked on for so long. It's great that I make all the big decisions that affect a lot of people. I feel that my life is shared with so many others. That they hold it too and are affected with whatever I want to do with it.

No, not yet. Definitely not yet.